I bet you don't remember half the things I'll never forget..

i smile because when i cry it doesnt help.
when i cry all it does is make people ask me if im okay,
i would love nothing more than to punch these people.
Cuz im sitting here crying, but yes i am perfectly happy.
i mean come on give me a break obviously im not fine.
i'm not going to ask you any pointless questions so you won't have the chance to give me any pointless answers.

I've somehow come to the point where i dont believe in happy endings anymore.. Yea, i've reached there moment of clarity where i know where i stand and what i want... But it has taken away my believe that happy endings exists...

I used to believe that we'll all end up happy with the person we love and that there's only one true love.. But now? It's gone.. That thought has vanished.. Somehow, i dont know how... But it's gone..


Now all that i think about is not the happy endings that i now know dont exist.. But the thought of who can once again make me happy? I seem to hav lost intrest in this something called a relationship.. You put so much hard work into something that u now know will eventually turn out into nothing. So why bother?


I used to always ask the question what is love? But i now realise love is nothing. People nowadays say those 3 words "i love you" like it's something that's supposed to be said when u're in a relationship. Well, it's not.. When do u know when u truly love that someone? Like i said, love is nothing.. U think u love that person cuz u feel comfortable when u're with that person. Like everything's meant to be. For that moment... Untill everything starts to fall apart and someone's heart gets broken.


Maybe in the near future u'll be reading another of my post where i'm telling u that i'm in love.. And that i've found someone.. But then again, how long will it last?

Some hearts are broken and mended.
Others are shattered and torned.
Although it was never intended
because love is eternally sworn,
I have cried, prayed, and pleaded for that love to hold it’s ground.
Hope was all I needed
But pain was all I found.